• Motherhood

    Please Don’t Make Me Do “Stuff”: 5 Effective Steps To Help Encourage Your Child To Do Chores.

    Hey Mama’s! How many of us have a “Please Don’t Make Me Do Stuff Kinda Kid?” I personally have two. So that’s twice the yelling and twice the headache. I recently found that these five easy steps have encouraged my children to actually want to do the chore.

    First thing First, No child is too young for chores. Whether it be picking up their toys to prepping dinner, NO CHILD SHOULD BE EXEMPT. WE live in the house together we take care of the house TO-GETHER. Often times, children feel that a chore is a type of punishment, but adding a little excitement can simply change the narrative.

    So First,

    1. Avoid any yelling, screaming, or nagging. If they are distracted by watching TV, On YouTube, or playing video games simply remove the distraction.
    2. Praise Them. I cannot stress to y’all how far a “Thank you soo much you are doing a really good job” can go.
    3. Times UP! What kid doesn’t like a game? Get a Timer set it and let them race against the clock.
    4. Nobody is perfect Sis. Don’t expect them to be perfect. Try not to go behind them to redo it. They need to feel confident, capable, and trusted to do so.
    5. Chart it up! Chore charts for the win. Visuals are always a good thing. Once they can see what they are actually doing makes it all worth the while.

    As parents, we feel obligated to pick up where our children lack or left. One thing I found helpful when guiding my children through a chore is to be present throughout. I found out the minute I left their side they’ll often leave the job undone. It is important that we teach our children to be consistent. Once they’ve become consistent enough to follow through with a chore until completed that chore have now become age-appropriate.

    Keep in mind, all children develop at different paces so here’s a list of chores our children should be able perform:

    10 and Under: (I focused on this age group because its most relate-able.)

    Ages 1-3

    • pick up toys.
    • Put shoes away
    • Brush teeth with assistance

    Ages 4-6

    • All chores above
    • Make up bed
    • Learn proper ways of washing during bath-time
    • Dress themselves
    • Make a bowl of cereal
    • Clear Table after meals
    • Unload dryer
    • Water Plants

    Ages 7-10

    • All chores above
    • Make Snacks and Simple meals ( Ex. scramble eggs, french toast, tuna salad)
    • Load dishwasher
    • Sweep floor, vacuum
    • Start a load of laundry
    • Fold/put laundry away
    • Assist with dinner

    So there you have it mommies, Lets prepare our little humans to be self- sufficient and responsible. I know for mines its rewarding to see them exciting about actually doing something and contributing in the home.

  • Motherhood

    Lions, Tigers, and Unicorn Pumpkins?!

    Getting out the house in a timely manner can be a hassle with children, especially mine (NO CAP) luckily Hubby job sponsored Employee Day at Zoo Atlanta this year so it didn’t take much to get them out the house.

    Weekends are usually a thing for me, as a child I don’t remember being in the house at all unless the weather prohibited. So I always aim to do the same with my children.

    We started our Day with an complimentary all you can eat breakfast buffet!

    Here’s a Recap:

    We started at the Children’s Zoo.
    (QUE Desiigner -Panda)
    Getting hands on with the animals was definitely a hit!


    MEANWHILE

    Junie was catching some much needed rest.

    Next Stop, The African Safari.

    If you guys follow me on IG (www.instagram.com/tiyonnatanikia), I posted some very interesting footage on stories. LMAO

    Ever got to touch an elephant? Well, they have an exhibit on what the skin actually feels like.

    Interesting enough the Giraffe was a family favorite!


    Although the Lions and Tigers were all afternoon napping we did get to see some bears walking the prowl. We, definitely enjoyed family time well spent.

    Until, next time ZOO ATLANTA!

    October Family Homework

    On Sunday, we had to be creative and decorate a paper pumpkin. We searched through pinterest for ideas and although we couldn’t any decorated paper pumpkins we decided to freestyle our own.

    How did we do?

    Here’s everything we used. Most items were purchased from Dollar Tree.
    Here’s the finished product. Our Unicorn Pumpkin!
    Mommy like to keep things clean and simple so I’m happy we all came to a happy medium.

  • Lifestyle,  Motherhood

    The Married Single Mother: Why Some Women Feel This Phenomenon Is All Too Common.

    So as many may feel that Marriage can bring families closer together and strengthen a union, as it may, but for some it can also challenge a couples ability to understand one’s feelings without being objective.

    How can one be objective? Well, when you can clearly see the issues that may be arising, however, you are not influenced by the opinions or feelings in considering what are actual facts. Now, many more of us can relate because this does not only happen in marriages, but also in relationships, partnerships, and maybe even in friendships.

    With two adults living in the same household, one can easily single-handedly feel like they are carrying a heavier load. This Phenenomon usually arise in woman and can come from a multitude of events.

    Here are some examples:

    For the last seven years I fall into category 3. Eight-five percent of the time after I went back to work this had been our norm. Now I can I also relate to SAHMs as well because I was one, moving 800 miles away from home I didn’t really have a choice then. Although this lifestyle has been a regular for me doesn’t make it any easier. Here’s why, My family grew, finances increased and circumstances have changed. So I am here to talk ways that Our Men can boggle down and not fall in the statistic of men believing” Its the Woman’s Job.”

    What are some suggestions that can prevent these feelings:

    1. Work together to come up with what works in your family. Tiredness? That falls on everyone beside the feeling of restlessness what else can you offer besides financial stability.
    2. Avoid negating ones feelings and concerns. In society, vulnerability is often a common issues. If they are open enough to express their feelings be open enough to listen and consider them.
    3. Alternate household chores. Constantly doing the same chore over and over can be overwhelming. Try sharing those chores so when one is down and out it doesn’t take much for the other adult to pick it right up.
    4. Give one a another a “Break” for Self Care. Self-Care is a subject of its own.

    Guys, how often is the chores left while one parent is sick? Heck! Sometimes this is the only time “if” that parent is able to relax in some sort of way. Its take a lot for the sole parenting individual to let down their hair and take a break. These breaks usually become prevalent when they fall ill. DON’T LET THAT BE THE CASE! Not to mention the extra-curricular activities, practices, and sports our children partake in. All these things can be a lot for any individual.

    Stop rectifying whose more physically tired than the other, Now like I mentioned earlier ‘The Unbalanced Career Couple’ has two working adults doesn’t matter if one is part-time, one is over night this is that decision was based upon the dynamics of the relationship so that should not be the main topic of discussion. Everyone will be tired when raising our future, working on bettering our future, and so fourth. Let’s all chip in to make this time every bit more enjoyable.

    To Conclude, there is no wrong feeling if a married woman or any woman feel like a single parent. This feeling to shall pass once kids grow older and dynamics continue to change but for the now, let go of those egos and in-sensitivities. Life Happens I get it, well all do. But, life doesn’t always have to be over-bearing and over-whelming. As the saying goes…

    Happy Wife, Happy Life!

  • Lifestyle

    My Jesus Year: 33 Lessons Every Millennial Should Learn By Age 30.

    I’ve always heard about the “Jordan Year” but not so much about the “Jesus Year”. According to urbandictionary.com , the 33rd year of your life is when you are reborn in some sense.

    “Based on varying estimates, most people generally accept that Jesus was appoximately 33 years old when he died.”

    retrieved from revelation.co.

    Age 33, is a milestone in itself for me. My mother, the Late Delores “Dee Dee” Higgins also died at age 33. I was 7 years old, the age of my eldest daughter, Taraji. Let that sink. I have a younger sister, at the time she was 4 years old, my middle child Taylor is 4. Let just ice the cake! My youngest brother was 2, and I have a 1 year old son named Isaac Jr. I am right where I belong and I cannot wait to start my year of re-birth. So yes – Jesus ME, Please!

    These three decades on earth I have realized:

    1. You are your own worst critic. Once you realize that the only person that stopping you is YOU, all roads lead to success.
    2. The world does not owe you anything. If you want something go for it! You owe yourself the world. Losing my parents at a young age, this one took a little longer to learn.
    3. No one is you, and that is your power. You might share the same interest as others but that doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll execute the plan the same way.
    4. God’s Plan – Stay focused on God’s plan. One’s true purpose remain unbeknownst when you are off course, pay attention to the signs around you and stay positive.
    5. You are the company you keep. Surround yourself around like-minded individuals.
    6. You cant live life for anyone but you. You’ll find that you will lose the most important asset, yourself.
    7. It is OK, to not be OK. We all have all moment of uncertainty, doubt, or defeat but this is what drives us to want more and do more.
    8. Your attitude and mindset is everything. You Put out positive thoughts, you get positive results.
    9. What is for you, is for you. It may not be your time, but it will come on time.
    10. Sis, you are LIT!
    11. STOP, hoping and wishing. I can’t tell you how many times I have to tell myself to stop saying “I wish” and say “I will”.
    12. It takes a village. I swear it does. Raising kids is NOT a walk in the park. Everyone who knows me, know I need an ear or three to vent.
    13. Vulnerability is not a weakness. Your just choosing not to hide your emotions no matter what others may think.
    14. Expect less, Prepare more. When you don’t expect as much from others you’ll leave less room for disappointments. You don’t like something change it.
    15. Pray, Pray, and Pray some more. Prayer is powerful.
    16. Consistency is key. Nothing will work unless you do.
    17. Everyone isn’t going to root for you. And that’s cool. Stop expecting everyone to be happy for you. Most times they are dealing with their own personal struggles.
    18. Communication is important. We all know this, yet there is still a lack there of.
    19. Mental Health is a thing. Check into your mind.
    20. No such thing as a Perfect Parent. We are all learning day by day, its a constant lesson.
    21. You are enough.
    22. You Never Know what Other Life entails. Social Media can just be the book cover and not the pages.
    23. You are you own “Goals”. Create the life You want.
    24. Good People still do exist. Just as everyone isn’t for you. Everyone isn’t against you either.
    25. It is impossible to control all of your thoughts. Especially when your restless, prepare your mind by getting an adequate amount of sleep. I can’t stress enough the role sleep deprivation can play on ones’ mind.
    26. It’s who you know and not what you know. Networking is an important tool in life, don’t be afraid to reach out to others. I can’t even explain the relationships I have made thus far just but simply reaching out.
    27. Invest in yourself. When your starting off with a fresh new idea it may not always be that easy. No one else is going to put forth money on an idea if you not serious about it.
    28. Its room at the table for all of us. Who said we have to compete to become successful? Like mentioned earlier it doesn’t matter how many others are doing what you want to do. No one will do it like you.
    29. Be teachable. All advice isn’t bad advice. Be open to constructive criticism.
    30. Where ever you are in life be there. These moments don’t last forever. How many times have we said we appreciate the moments when….exactly!
    31. Pace Yourself. Life is not a race, measuring your accomplishments to your friends is unhealthy.
    32. Trials require isolation. Stop taking peoples absence so personal. Personally for me, If we good we good. It doesn’t matter how long in between we speak ill fall right back in as if it were yesterday.
    33. Protect your peace!